Update On The Big Boy Bed

Well it has now been three nights in our big boy bed. He is doing awesome. The only problem I am having is getting him to nap. He WILL not stay in the bed to save his life at nap time. It has really came down to how much do I want to fight it. The answer is not very hard. The benefits that have occurred is he is going to bed very easily at 6:30 and not waking up till 7:00. This schedule works for me except I do love that afternoon quite time.

The Little Guy

My little guy has had a very exciting week. He started swimming lessons on Thursday. He had a hard time getting useto the water, but once he was in he did great. The other huge change we had this week was moving to a big boy bed. Tonight is the first night in our new car bed. He is very excited. I will keep you posted on how the transition goes. Wish me luck in continuing to live my dream.

My dreams

After coming home from the women's retreat this weekend I feel like I have alot to share. I'm not sure where to start, but I will just give you some quick insight into the weekend.
I had a great time with friends. My roommates Leslie, Karen, and Abby made me laugh nonstop. They were great to bunk with. One night Leslie and I went into JULIE and Sharon's room for a game night. (julie I have now used your name twice on my post and one of the times I put it in caps).
Here's the deal with the game night. I don't like games. This may surprise many of you, but I am extremely competitive. The girls made me laugh and I was able to make it through the dumb game. Of course I had to state that the game was dumb several times.
The music was so wonderful on the retreat. Lara did a wonderful job allowing the Holy Spirit to flow through her talent. It was so beautiful to hear 60 women praising the Lord.
Abby organized the weekend and not one thing was left out. It was perfect!!!!!!
I have to tell you my friend Karen did a great job with the hospitality. I loved all the treats we got in our rooms each day.
The highlight of my weekend was definitely the insight that I had when I got home. My husband was actually the one who really helped me realize what I got out of the weekend. The last day we were there the speaker asked us what our dreams are. She asked us if we are living our dream. She said everyone has one and everyone needs to be driving towards it.
When I got home I told Ryan I don't really have a dream. I feel like my dream is the life I am living. Ryan said, " that is your dream." You are living your dream. All I ever wanted to do was be a mom. I wanted to be a wife and a mom. Coming from a broken home I wanted to have a stable family who served the Lord. I wanted to be a mom who shared the Lord with her kids. Thank you Lord for this dream. Thank you for letting me live my dream!!!!!
I am sure there will be many more dreams in my life, but for now this dream is real and I am able to live it out.

UPDATE ON CAFFEINE

Many of you know that today was the opening for Dutch Brothers. I didn't know this, but thanks to some great friends they shared the news. I'm going to start out by blaming these two friends for this blog. As I am waiting in line for an hour I decide that I am done being off caffeine. I have decided that I hate myself without that energy boost. I NEED THAT ENERGY!!!!!!!! I decide the best thing to do was to call my husband my accountability partner. He said just go ahead and get a coffee. After a month off caffeine he is done with my complaining. A month ago I read a book about caffeine and how bad it is for you. The book really convicted me to make myself go off of it. Ryan went off too and he is doing great and feeling great. The same did not happen for me. I have been very irritable, and very hungry. Caffeine is a known appetite suppressant. Many of the over the counter appetite suppressants are just a huge shot of espresso in pill form. Because of this I am confessing to all of you my weight is going crazy. I just can't have this. It really starts to weigh on my emotions (no pun intended). So as of today I am done. I am back on and NO ONE CAN STOP ME.

Prayer

So my journey continues with this deep longing I have to grow in my relationship with the Lord.
A couple of days ago I was in the shower doing a quick five minute prayer thinking that would be a good way to start the day. Before I continue this story, I must clarify that I totally understand that this is not the way to start my day. I completly get it that I SHOULD wake, up grab my bible, sit down and focus on the Lord before the rest of my day starts. Well, I hate to say I am still really sturggling with this. I recognize that it is a problem and it is a really selfish problem. So, on with the story, I was in the shower doing my prayer and as I was praying I found myself saying, "Dear Lord please give us a good night sleep with sweet dreams." This was not a good sign of where my prayer life is.
Praying has never been a strenghth of mine. This is so horriable to admit, but I know you will not judge me. I hate to admit but my prayer life usually consists of, a quick shower prayer for the day, and a night prayer with the kids. I always find myself on my knees when a problem occurs, but that is the only time.
It's funny, because I have talked to so many people that say to me, "I have a really hard time reading the word, but I spend alot of time praying." If this is true I am in Big trouble because I am struggling with both.
My first step in developing this prayer life of mine is really trying to understand what prayer is. That has been my focus this week. Simply put, prayer is a way to communicate with the Lord. It is the way we can talk to Him and He can talk to us. It is a way to be silent before the Lord and listen to His will for me. It is a way for me to experesse my feeling to God. When I really think about it, how in the world would I have a good relationship with my husband if we didn't talk? How can I expect to have a great realationhip with the Lord if I don't talk to Him. My PRAYER is that God will continue to open my eyes and heart to the understanding of this wonderful comminication between me and my Heavenly Father.
I am so excited about talking to the Lord and listening to Him.

Growing Deeper

I am in a very intersting place in my life right now. I have a wonderful husband great kids, an awesome church, beautiful friends. With all of this said I think God is saying Kristan you aren't were you need to be in your relationship with ME. I feel God tugging on me and saying Kristan you aren't bringing me completly in to this wonderful life I have given you. I have been very convicted on the amount of time I give to the LORD. How can I excpect to grow deeper in the Lord if my time is not given to Him. Now that my bed time is earlier, and my brain is no longer clouded with caffiene I feel that I am going to run with this feeling and take a spiritual inventory. My prayer is that God will open my eyes and my heart to put my focus on HIM. To focus on where my daily priorities are and how they fit into this deeper relationship with the LORD.

Morgan's wonderful week

Wow!!!!!!! My little princess continues to grow up. As I have said many times I am having a really hard time with my baby growing up. I'm sure it boils down to the control that I want to have over her life. As she gets older I am losing more and more of that control. I have given my children over to the LORD many times. I repeatedly say to myself, they are not your children Kristan they are God's. Well, these words keep getting harder and harder as they grow up.
This week Morgan had a very exciting week. She reached to major milestones. The first occurred on Friday at school during chapel when she received a certificate in front of the school that she was caught being good. This certificate is like getting student of the month. Three other kids got this award and at some point in the year all of the kids will get one. But, for this day and this moment I felt like my daughter was the center of the world. I of coursed had to fight back the tears as I watched her go up on stage and get this award. I waved and smiled and made a complete fool of myself, but I didn't care!!!!!
The second milestone came on Saturday when she lost her first tooth. This was a huge deal because alot of her friends have been losing teeth for a while. Morgan has been really excited for this moment to happen. I think she has been playing with her teeth for the last six months trying to get one to fall out. Well yesterday was the day. She told Ryan and I that her lose tooth had to come out. She went in the bathroom and came out with one less tooth. Of course I cried again for this step in her life.
My prayer for this little angel is she will continue to grow in the Lord and strive to be the best Godly women she can be.
Thank you Lord that I have been able to experience such a wonderful gift on earth.